It seems like women are often stereotyped and judged for just about everything from what they wear, their hair, their career, their financial well-being, and more. It’s no wonder that there are a lot of myths about single moms out there. Everyone seems to have their own take, even women who should know to look beyond the stereotypes and the myths to the actual person.
Still, those myths persist. Below, we will discuss and debunk several of them.
Myth #1: Single Moms Only Want Welfare
This is a sad stereotype that has been perpetuated for decades. There is a belief that tends to be strong among conservatives that women who are single moms and who are using public assistance prefer that lifestyle. Conservative politicians and radio hosts, like Neal Boortz, have likened single mothers on assistance as being “broodmares”, meaning they are just animals used for breeding. It’s hard to even start dissecting just how wrong those people are.
Single mothers who are on assistance aren’t there because they want to be. It’s simply their circumstance and one that they want to get out of as soon as they can. Women still earn less than men on average, though, so it’s difficult to pull yourself up when you have a child and a job. It’s not always easy to just find another job that pays more.
Myth #2: Single Moms Can’t Give Their Kids Love and Attention
Here’s another myth about single moms. Just because they are busy doesn’t mean that they can’t give their children the sort of love and attention that comes from a two-parent household. It often just means that the poor mom is a lot more tired at the end of the day than others are. They have just as much love to give, but they are likely to suffer from burnout if they can’t manage to balance their work and social lives.
Myth #3: Single Moms Can’t Make Ends Meet or Save Money
As mentioned, a lot of women aren’t making as much as their male counterparts in the same or similar jobs. Therefore, it may seem like single moms can’t make ends meet and which is why they need public assistance. While it’s true that some moms are struggling and may need public assistance now, many are working second jobs or starting their own part-time businesses to earn a bit more.
Single mothers can make ends meet. Whether it’s because they have a main job that pays well, because they had to get a second job, or that they needed assistance, they can and do get things done. It doesn’t mean it’s always easy, of course.
Myth #4: Single Moms Can’t Buy a House
Along the same lines, there is the pervasive myth that single mothers are never going to own a home of their own. They will always be renters.
First of all, there’s nothing wrong with renting if that’s what you prefer or that’s all that you can afford right now. Rentals are fine as long as you have a good and safe place to live for you and the kids.
However, you’ll find that single moms can buy a home just like anyone else. As long as they have the income, the credit score, a down payment, and the desire, they can buy. There are a lot of resources for single mothers. 25% of all first-time homebuyers are single women.
Myth #5: Single Moms Are Always Looking for a New Father Figure for the Kids
If you were to believe pop culture, you’d think that single moms are always hunting for men to become a father figure in their children’s lives. While someone might be looking for someone special, it doesn’t mean they are looking for an instant daddy.
Men don’t have to worry that they will suddenly start wearing socks with sandals or that they will start telling terrible puns all the time. No one is going to make them become dads.
However, along the same lines, many single moms who are dating aren’t looking for casual flings. They are looking for something more, but it doesn’t mean instant fatherhood.
Myth #6: It’s Too Hard to Date as a Single Mom
There is some truth that it’s hard to date as a single mom. However, that’s because it’s hard to date no matter who you are. It’s a weird and wild world out there, and dating is difficult. That doesn’t mean that you should give up on dating if you’re a single mom, of course. It just means that you might want to take your time and make sure you’re finding the right people.
Myth #7: Single Moms Can’t Find and Keep Love
Here’s another harsh myth that’s just that—a myth. Just because someone is a single mother doesn’t mean that she was the reason the relationship fell apart. People grow distant all of the time. Sometimes, a relationship might’ve been abusive. Just because someone is a single mom doesn’t mean she can’t find love. It merely means she hasn’t found the right person yet.
Myth #8: Single Moms Hate Men
This is another myth that still holds a lot of sway. Some people, including women, feel that single moms must hate men, especially if they aren’t even looking for someone new. It’s assumed that they feel angry or bitter and that it must’ve been their partners that left.
Sure, you might dislike or even hate your ex, but that shouldn’t lump you into a group of people that despise all men. Along the same lines, there is a belief that single women want to find married men. It’s a ridiculous myth, but it’s one a lot of women hold onto, especially if a single woman is friends with their husband.
These are just some of the myths about single moms that somehow continue to persist. Fortunately, you’ve now seen that none of them are true. Sure, there are bad characters amongst all groups, but no one should be stereotyped, especially for inaccurate myths like these.